Minds go wacky

Finally, finished designing this blog site. Always wanted to re-blog but didn’t manage to do it until now. The reason I wanted to re-blog because I heard this phrase from a HK series “When people are sad, they don’t go for coffee, beer or clubs. They write blogs. It helps you by expressing yourself”. I totally think it’s so true by saying that. Blogs can express you in certain way no matter your sad or happy.

I’ve been sick for the past few days. The weather in Melbourne is driving me NUTs. Its always the case when the season changes my flu, cough and sore throat will just automatically come back. I hate being sick. Its irritating and I really can’t gym that often.

I bloody hate it!!
While sitting on my comfy bed , looking at my lap top screenie with a cup of hot chocolate, many thoughts, memories and worries a going through my mind but most important that I really worried about my relationship. My relationship is at stake. I haven’t been talking to ling ling for many days. I am not even sure what is he doing lately. Is he busy? Is he working? He can’t go online? To be honest, I am afraid that ling ling is hiding something. Maybe he found someone else. I am not sure, just guessing but still it always struck me. There is a lot of disadvantages in this so called long distance relationship. T-R-U-S-T. Trust is the element I need in my relationship but I don’t think I can really do it. My ling ling once told me that we haven’t come across trusting each other without having doubts. I do agree with him but I really want him to believe that I trust him so much and in fact I want him to trust me as well and to be honest to each other. Having said that, I really love my baby dearly and he is the only dear that cares a lot for me. This ling ling of mine is a wise man, caring, grumpy at times but I still love him for that, sexy, cute and so much more I can’t even finish describing. This guy of mine is the ONE I want to live with for the entire life. Sometimes, I wish that he would come over to Melbourne and find a job n live here with me but I’ve got to wake up from my fairy tale la la land that it’s difficult to move over here. Again, if I were to choose to live here and grow my roots here, what am I gonna do and what about my ling ling? Future is hard to predict but no matter how, I am still worried. It sometimes makes me sad that I can’t be there emotionally or physically with my ling ling. Although he kept saying, boy, you are here with me. The truth is I really want to be there with him like normal gay couple does. They go out, have dinner and have sex. I want that too!!!

I will stop here, my uni friends are coming over. Better get ready.

p/s: DEAR, BABY MISS YOU N LOVE U.

Hugs